Val Salia- The unfortunate souls involved.


			*The Basumer Household*
	Coras Winters Age: 27 Info: The eldest son of the Winters family. After his parents died in a tragic tennis accident, he was left to care for his three younger brothers, turning to the world of illicit underground activities for the quick money he desperately needed. He moved himself and his brothers to an apartment complex in the middle of the desert, worrying for their safety due to his job, and has since homeschooled them. A naturally kind-hearted person, he would prefer to settle down and make an honest living, but he can't seem to shake off the chains cast upon him by the underground life he lives. Has recently become a resident of the Basumer household, and Celes' fiancé due to complications in his latest mission. Likes: Quiet days, mint tea, the feeling of accomplishment, jam-free firearms. Dislikes: Loose women, alcohol, the Russian mafia, the Italian mafia, the Irish mafia, the Brazilian mafia, the Israeli mafia, the Yakuza, the gang of teenagers with pointy sticks down the road, anyone else that's out to get him. Interesting fact: Works through nearly half a bottle of anti-anxiety pills every week.


	Celes Basumer Age: 20 Info: The eldest daughter of the Basumer family, and recovering tomboy. Possesses an innate childlike innocence and a tendency towards kindness that could put Mother Teresa to shame. Graduated with honors at a local college at age 18, but has made no move to secure a career. Plans to marry Coras. Likes: Soccer, the smell of fresh rain, family, helping! Dislikes: Cruel people, misfortune, shouting, the unsettling concept of spontaneous combustion. Interesting fact: Microwaves give her seizures.


	Vislet Basumer Age: 15 Info: The younger daughter of the Basumer family. Takes after her mother's stoic nature, and shares her sister's unexplainably high intelligence. But rather than finding a constructive use for it, she spends most of her days isolated in old literature. Has difficulty interacting with others, but sees it as an entertaining challenge rather than a problem. Likes: Monochrome art, Nightwish, the smell of matches. Dislikes: The Goth phenomena, politics, Mentos commercials. Interesting fact: Has dyslexia.


	Rulibel Basumer Age: 39 Info: The mother of the Basumer family. A harsh childhood spent wandering the desert with her family of Kurdish nomads, in addition to years of mothering Celes and Vislet have long since drained her of any enthusiasm and excitement she once had, though she seems perfectly content with her life as it is. Beneath her stoic exterior lies a wise and patient woman, albeit one who can crush a human skull between her fingers. Her authority is unquestioned within the house when exercised. Likes: Hot days, 17th century Arabian poetry, fine red wine. Dislikes: Cold days, her height, whining. Interesting fact: A two-time national fencing champion.
Coming Soon


	"Father" Basumer Age: 42 Info: The father of the Basumer family. A respectable businessman and wise parent, the paragon of fatherhood itself; as if someone ripped a kindly old dad from a Norman Rockwell painting and brought it to life. An excitable man however, prone to spur-of-the-moment decisions. Likes: His ol' smokin' pipe, his ol' fishin' rod, his ol' sittin' chair, his ol' pummelin' bludgeon, nude Mexican rodeos. Dislikes: Lawyers, family arguments, the Illuminati. Interesting fact: Harbors a dark secret that eats away at his tormented soul each day! As he tumbles down a self-destructive spiral of sex, drugs and rock n' roll, will Casey the busty high-school cheerleader come to terms with her feelings and confess her love to him before prom night, coincidentally the anniversary of his old love's tragic heroin overdose and the night he swore he would no longer be known as a loser, but as a man worthy of respect and adoration, not unlike a foppish rogue in the Victorian days of yore! Oh, how he would prance about the king's courtyard in such a radical and flambouyant blaze of passion that the ladies would faint upon the very sighting of this mysterious dandy! But fear not my little ones, for as they say, a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.
Coming Soon


		The Thousand Acres Apartments

	Koli Age: 19 Info: The oldest of the Winters brothers, not including Coras. Given his behavior though, it's difficult to tell. Could rightfully be called insane, but the truth is he simply enjoys his eccentric lifestyle too much to care about any sort of normalcy. Selfish beyond measure, and lives solely for his own sense of enjoyment. Likes: Heavily salted foods, German Oompa bands, cold rainy days. Dislikes: Walls, pop music, the idea of heliocentricity, and just about every type of sauce known to man (due to a traumatizing, yet vaguely entertaining childhood event) Interesting fact: Addicted to cough syrup.


	Roland Age: 17 Info: The middle child. Admires Coras' profession and seeks to follow in his footsteps, despite Coras' objections. Trains daily to perfect his deadly arts, which has proved difficult considering the only things within a 100-mile radius are his brothers, the apartment complex, and lots and lots of sand. Likes: General acts of violence, vodka, The Godfather, cheap romantic novels. Dislikes: Hugh Grant, fuzzy keychains, tiny dogs. Interesting fact: Is terrified of clowns.


	Viracrois Age: 14 Info: The youngest of the Winters brothers, and oddly enough, probably the wisest of the lot. With his calm and collected personality, he often takes the role of responsibility when Coras is gone. He's the only one of the brothers too young to remember life before moving to The Thousand Acres, and life in the wasteland is all he's ever known. For this reason, he has never seen a member of the opposite sex outside TV, the internet, and Cindy. Strangely enough, thinks of himself as a ladies' man. Likes: "The ladies," games n' anime, fancy clothes. Dislikes: Coconuts, overly-emotional people, being ignored. Interesting fact: Owns fifteen pairs of mittens.


	Cindy Age: 22 Info: It is unknown exactly when or why she came to live at The Thousand Acres, but was living there before the Winters family moved in. Runs a profitable blog for a living, albeit a meager one. Her sole source of entertainment is the three brothers, who she mercilessly toys with when the mood hits. Likes: Bloody action flicks, being prepared for all possible situations, collecting morbid facts and statistics, being a smartypants. Dislikes: Being patted on the head, drama, closed-minded thinking. Interesting fact: A preoccupation with survival situations, particularly the apocalypse.